About Me

My name is *REDACTED* and I’m a carb addict. This is where I share ups and downs of my recovery. This blog is my safe space to reflect and process my daily struggles, where I don’t always need to be strong or have all the answers. A tool to help me commit to my recovery and create a level of accountability.

I’ve had a complicated relationship with carbs all my life. I had moments of clarity recognising my food addiction, but usually dismissed it as ’not a thing’. It wasn’t until March 2024 that I fully embraced addiction as a framework for understanding my state of being. It took me a while to realise that this is not the latest fad, that for me carb abuse has as serious health consequences as alcohol or drugs.

Back in 2008, my GP diagnosed me with type 2 diabetes. It was a shock. In hindsight, I’m not sure why I found it that surprising. Diabetes runs in the family. Since my early childhood, I had been going back and forth between being obese and overweight, and had nothing close to a healthy lifestyle. The excitement didn’t last. After the initial battery of tests, some diabetes awareness training and treatment plan being put in place, I went back to my old life. While I’ve always been quite good at taking my medication, it was way too easy to ignore everything else. You don’t feel diabetes until it you develop complications caused by it, by which time it is too late to think about prevention. But who cares when they are young and free?

Fast forward to February 2024. My annual diabetes review highlighted that despite me maxing out on multiple types of oral medication, my diabetes was totally out of control (HbA1c level at 95 mmol/mol, with a healthy range of 41 mmol/mol or below). I felt panicked. A lot had happened over the 15 years since my diabetes diagnosis. Family, children, bills to pay… I realised I can no longer be a passive bystander in looking after my health. I faced a choice - go on insulin therapy (with all its implications) to at least better treat symptoms resulting from my poor choices or go for the root cause and radically re-think how I do food and exercise. Or both.

I discussed insulin therapy with my GP and got referred to the community diabetes team to explore the next steps. During this appointment, I also expressed my concern that while my priority was to bring my diabetes under control, changing medication was not really addressing the root cause. I just came out and said it - I understand that uncontrolled consumption of carbs is effectively killing me, but I often feel powerless in the face of what can only describe as an addiction. I half-expected to be told to stop whining, toughen up, and sort it out. However, something completely unexpected happened. They offered me an appointment with another GP who runs specialist clinics for diabetics with a focus on a low-carb lifestyle and food addiction.

I didn’t know what to expect and felt apprehensive as I was waiting for my appointment. It turned out there was no need. I felt listened to, acknowledged, and validated. The doctor recommended I read Fork in the Road: A Hopeful Guide to Food Freedom by Dr Jen Unwin. Wow! It felt like each sentence in the book was about me and my experience. Realising others share similar challenges and seeing a way forward was very empowering. My only regret in all this is that I didn’t speak up about my struggles and seek specific help sooner.

Fork in the road indeed! So here I am, setting out on my journey of recovery from carb addiction. Why stay anonymous? Mostly because I am ashamed of my myself. Ashamed for knowing exactly what I need to do, but being a hostage to my addiction. I now recognise this is a health condition I need to manage on top of my other ailments. While I’m starting to accept this myself, I don’t yet feel ready to share this openly with those around me. Hopefully, one day!